I’m posting this from Japan. It really is the perfect trip. It’s only two nights away from home, plus I got to FLY. I had the first leg to Japan: Narita International Airport which serves Tokyo although it is strangely 2 hours away from Tokyo. Soon after takeoff from San Francisco International, I glanced over at the captain’s side window…and saw some dark splatters. Did we hit a bird? We all agreed we must have, but we didn’t feel anything. Where’s the blood and feathers…and why’s the stain brown and spreading like cat vomit on my kitchen floor during hairball season? Guts, the captain determines. Makes sense to me. But as we continue to accelerate to 320 knots and we head out over the Pacific, the brown slime continues to spread until it has covered a good deal of the captain’s side window (located just forward of his left shoulder).
With a feeling of dread no doubt shared with characters in cheesy horror flicks, we realize we do not know what it is…and if it will eat through the window, invading our frail human bodies to use us as hosts in order to take…over…the…world!!! (er, sorry. But I am a writer and the scenario did go through my mind.) The captain DID gamely offer to switch seats, however, which I declined. Silent seconds tick by. He touches a tentative fingertip to the glass…and his finger comes away brown and we realize that some of the stuff…IS…INSIDE. (insert bloodcurdling scream and the screen goes black)
Okay, cut to our satellite radio call to maintenance after level off where we learn the brown slime is not a hostile alien life form but lowly window sealant that was not given the proper time to dry before we took off. The window is fine–it’s attached by bolts not the sealant–and the captain with a look of relief, loosens his seatbelt. This horror story, at least, had a happy ending.
Onward to Narita, skirting the Alaska and the Aleutian Islands as we complete the quick (for me, Sydney and China girl) 10.5 hours flight. The captain is an ex-Navy pilot and says he’ll have to buy me a beer IF when I land, the nose wheels straddle the runway centerline, I land in the touchdown zone, AND I receive at least one unsolicited customer compliment. If not all criteria are met, I have to buy HIM a beer. So, of course as we are descending, there is turbulence with warnings of very stronger bumpies in the area. Heh, no problem. As we are on final approach, the airplane ahead of us reports windshear: a 10 knot loss of speed on final. As if that will scare me. But I have to carry extra speed now to compensate. We are landing on runway 34L. There is a cross wind out of the northeast 040 degrees at 17 knots. Piece of cake, that’s just like what the inquisitors give in the simulator at the Chamber of Horrors. I soar over the threshold a little hot and with a slight acceleration trend on the airspeed. With my wing low into the wind and opposite rudder pressed to straighten the nose, I land on centerline and so sweetly soft, too, although a little long due to the extra speed. Ahhhh. I can taste that Asahi now.
You know what, though? I didn’t get one freaking compliment from a passenger. 298 people onboard and not one, NOT ONE, thought to say, “Are we down yet, because I surely couldn’t feel the wheels touch.” So, I lost my beer. Know what? Next time you fly and the landing is really good, and especially when you feel bumps and gusts on the way down, pass on a little compliment to your needy pilot. You will make her or his day. (and possibly earn them a beer!)
Good news was: the captain was such a good guy, he bought me a beer after the flight anyway!
Oh! I’m “plogging” on Amazon, too. It’s what Amazon calls the blogs you can post on your books’ pages. They will be different from what I post here, more book and promo related whereas this blog is dedicated to the flying side of my life. So, come see and leave me a comment if you like! (whereas although I see and love reading every one of your comments–and keep ’em coming!–I do not normally reply to comments left here due to the sheer lack of time. However, I do plan to respond as time permits over at Amazon) >>>>>
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0373771061
